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Duane Sampson -> RE: RE:Police Blotter (6/9/2008 10:08:36 AM)
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Yep. That's why you just stare straight at the cop. It pisses 'em off but that's life.
They don't need to waste your time with that crap anyhow. They can just say you swerving or whatever.
I did the dance for a rookie cop one night. It was hilarious. I got pulled over in town, 3 miles from where "I supposedly" was seen by an off duty cop running a country road stop sign.
I was DD that night and stone ass sober. The punk cop was trying to be a tough guy cause my boys were feeling pretty good and kind of hooting him. I told him I wasn't drinking, he said he didn't believe me. So then he said he wanted me to take a couple of the field tests.
I said, "Yeah, seems like you still gotta wait 12 minutes to make me blow."
That pissed him off. [&:] Then he told me to walk 15 paces heel to toe, turn and comeback 15 paces in a straight line. I said, "I don't know what you mean. Show me."
So the cop walks 4 paces heel to toe, turns and walks back 4 paces. So then I did 4 paces back and forth. He said, "I said 15!' I said, "I did what you did, show me!" [&:]
Then he does 15 and back sliding around in his slippery shoes and then I did it for him, perfectly.
Next was stand on one foot and count to 20. I said, "Show me." The cop tries to do it and loses his balance. [&:]
So I say, "Want me to stumble like that too?" [&:] Then I stand on one foot and count to 40 sumthin' when he finally says I can stop. I said, "I can do this all night, sir."
There's an older cop with this rookie punk and he's trying not to laugh. I mean the guy literally has his hand over his mouth. The guys in my truck are laughing and the cop tells them to stop or they're going to jail. They stopped, at least I didn't hear much from them after that.
So then junior does the eye flutter bullshit you posted above. I stare right into his face. He's telling me to follow the light, I keep staring straight at him and saying, "I am!"
By now he's really pissed. He tells me I have to blow now. I said, "I did the tests better than you, why should I. Oh, it's been 15 minutes all ready?"
Then he says, "If you don't, I'll take you in right now for refusing. "
So I blow and it's clean, I hadn't drank anything but one beer over 6 hours earlier.
So Barney says, "Well, you passed."
I said, "Want me try again, you seem dissapointed." [&:]
Then he gives me a ticket for the stop sign thing that was bullshit too. He said I can challenge the ticket in court if I want to. So I asked him when his day off was. Cops hate going to traffic court on their days off. [:'(]
Anyhow, when I left I told my buddies they were lucky that they shut up when they did 'cause he could've popped 'em for interference.
I didn't run the stop sign, I wasn't speeding, had nothing to drink, no smell of alcohol or drugs, NOTHING. I "aced" the tests the baby cop couldn't even do and he still made me blow. Poor little fellow was trying to get a little boner playing tough guy. He got "OWNED" [&:]
I paid the $45 bucks, piss on it. I hate cops.
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